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Keeping Teens Safe on the Internet

© Terrie Lynn Bittner

While most parents today wouldn't dream of leaving a seven-year-old alone on the Internet, they often become too comfortable about letting their teens surf unattended. Don't be certain that your child knows and obeys the rules you have set up.

As soon as we signed on for Internet service, we moved our computer into the living room. It might not have been the most attractive room decoration, but we wanted the computer in plain sight. Our teens know that we have the right to stroll in and look over their shoulders at any time-and we do. They have also been instructed to tell us any time they come across inappropriate sites or conversations. This can happen in places that seem safe. I used to allow my younger children to surf through the children's section of a well-known home page site. These sites were monitored. However, one day my daughter jumped out of her chair, turned her back to the computer and called me over. I found photographs of young-very young-girls in a forest, nude and carrying candles. I reported it and thanked my daughter for immediately leaving the site. They know to hit the back button or to turn away immediately upon encountering these types of pictures.

Be careful about the chat rooms your teens frequent, particularly if they are younger. There are a few mild and monitored rooms that are generally safe for children, but I always require my younger teens to have me in the room, and my oldest teens to chat only when I'm home. There is only one chat room my two youngest children are allowed to visit. One day a conversation became a bit risque-not pornographic, but not appropriate for children. The monitor, knowing my daughter was 11, asked the chatters to change the subject. My daughter (not knowing what a loincloth was) didn't actually understand what the conversation meant, but when the topic continued, the monitor instructed my daughter to leave the room, and to tell me that she had been told to leave because of inappropriate conversation. The chatters were then blocked from the site. Unless you find a room like this, keep your younger children out of chat rooms and never let any teen chat alone.

Teens tend to be trusting. It's hard for them to believe that the adorable 16 year old boy in England they met might be 40 years old and living down the street. One teen explained to me she knew her online boyfriend was telling the truth because she'd seen his picture. He only wanted her address so he could send her a birthday card. Well, anyone can get their hands on a picture of a sixteen-year-old boy. They do not know who is on the other end of the keyboard. Unfortunately, even if they won't give out their address, they might easily give out so much information that a sex offender could find them anyway, simply through casual conversation. Mentions of school, a community center, working parents who leave them alone until 7:00 P.M., a sports team....soon he has gathered enough information to find them and to find them alone. Through telephone numbers-or caller ID if your teen calls him-and a reverse phone directory, he can easily find your home. Be sure to visit this site if you have teen surfers:

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