Something To Consider

Imagine: Your parent who is up in years has been feeling tired and listless for a number of weeks/months. General aches and pains, perhaps a loss of appetite, difficulty sleeping. All pretty vague complaints in and of themselves, but you encourage your parent to make an appointment to see their doctor. When the time comes for the appointment, you offer to go along for moral support, and to ensure that your parent tells the doctor everything.

The physician listens to your parent, and asks you a few questions about any observations you may have made during the period of time in question. If your observations are different from what your parent has revealed, you will probably reveal this to the physician out of the hearing of your parent. Even though you want to maintain your parent's dignity, you also understand the importance of complete, accurate information to the physician in order for a correct diagnosis and healing plan.

The physician orders blood work and perhaps an EKG or other various tests, which you help your parent schedule. Chances are, you will at least remind your parent of these appointments, or maybe accompany him/her to the testing place. Not all older people, but some, are in awe of the medical technology and prefer to avoid it; others simply don't understand what all the fuss is about for an "oldster with aches and pains" anyway.

Over the next few days, you probably spend more time worrying over the test results than your parent does, or maybe you have to put some fears of your parent's to rest during this wait-and-see period. One afternoon, your parent gives you a call, telling you the doctor has called and wants your parent to come into the office to talk about the test results. The appointment is arranged; you become increasingly concerned, understanding that the tests must have revealed something unhealthy to necessitate seeing your parent again, but you don't want to unduly alarm your parent. When it is your parent who reveals his/her own alarm, you do your best to diminish his/her worry by saying you feel the doctor is being thorough and professional.

As the nurse takes your parent and you back to the exam room, the nurse pulls you aside and asks that you wait in the doctor's conference room. You tell your parent you will be with them in a few minutes, and wait in the conference room for the physician. The physician comes to speak with you before going to talk with your parent. The doctor relates that the tests reveal a serious, potentially life-threatening disease process within your parent's body, and that the doctor is recommending further tests, and perhaps a specialist down the line.

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