And While We're Talking About Gifts...

Now that we've honed down the gift-giving list to the people to whom we truly want to give gifts, it's time to decide what gifts will be appreciated by the recipient. A gift does no good if it only makes the giver happy, since the idea of presenting someone with a gift is to make the receiver happy. It is with this in mind that I make the following suggestions:

DON'T buy any knickknacks, bric-a-brac, or even any paddy whacks for anybody, ever, regardless of age! No one that I know of needs yet one more dust collector or one more memento of someone else's idea of cute, symbolic, or otherwise.

That being said, there are all kinds of things an older adult would love to receive; things that will make their life easier, more fun, or enjoyable. The top gift for anyone on your list, at any age, is not a thing or a service...it is YOU. Your time, your attention, your presence, if only on the other end of the phone, means more to someone who cares about you than any single or combined gift that can be purchased. Stop by for coffee a couple of times a week; take them out to a movie or for dinner; let them cook you dinner; arrange to call once a week or more; take a car ride once a week; look at old photo albums together; swap recipes...I think you get the idea. Of course, your proximity to the gift receiver will dictate which of these, or other ideas, is practical for your situation. But know, above all, that even better than buying the folks a condo in Florida, is being with you.

Other gifts that show consideration for the gift receiver are things such as these: cordless phone and demonstration on how to use it; stamps and stationary; stick-on address labels; big button phone; payment of a monthly utility; gift certificate at the grocery store; smoke detector and/or installation of new batteries in smoke detector; medical alert device and service; long distance phone cards; night lights; flashlights; handheld shower; tape recorder for keeping a verbal journal or telling of family history; audio books; prepaid snow removal service or lawn service...

Ah, you say, none of these are very flashy gifts, and I agree with you there. But I don't think flashy is required, but rather those things/services which will enhance the quality of the gift receiver's life. If the person is on a tight budget, when you pay for something such as a utility bill that they would normally have to pay themselves, or buy food staples that free them from doing so, what you are really giving that person is some independence. That person now has some money freed up that they can do what they choose with it. That is a very nice gift you have then given them...the thing which we all surrender with the most difficulty...independence.

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