Breaking Free: My Struggle with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
When I first sought treatment for OCD, my therapist helped me explore my childhood. I think he wanted to place blame somewhere. We both wanted to explain OCD, make sense out of it. Then he tried to talk me out of my obsessive thoughts and compulsive behavior. Didn't he realize I had already tried to talk myself out of OCD?
I began to realize I was involved in a battle. My enemy was OCD. One of the most important weapons in my battle would be education. Even as a nurse, I knew very little about the disorder. I searched for help in books, articles and online.
Obsessive-compulsive disorder is a neurobiological disorder affecting 2.5% of people. It is characterized by obsessions or compulsion, usually both, that are time consuming or distressing. They interfere with normal routine, relationships with others or daily functioning. Obsessions are persistent impulses, ideas, images or thoughts that intrude into a person's thinking and cause anxiety. Compulsions are repetitive behaviors or mental acts performed to relieve or prevent anxiety. They may also have a goal of preventing or avoiding some dreaded event. My research led me to other weapons I would need for the battle with OCD, such as cognitive- behavior therapy and medication. Prozac makes my obsessions milder helps me resist the compulsions. It did not completely remove the symptoms, but Prozac makes it easier for me to wield the next weapon I needed, cognitive behavioral therapy.
Cognitive therapy involves attempts at changing distorted thinking and beliefs. Behavior therapy teaches the skills needed to gain better control over one's behavior. Together they work well to combat OCD. Exposure and response prevention is the type of behavior therapy most frequently used for treating OCD. It involves exposure to the things we fear most, then prevention of the usual response.
An example is exposure to my door locking obsession and resisting the compulsion to check the door again and again until "it felt right." I started with small steps. I checked everything carefully and left the house for a few minutes, graduating to quickly checking and leaving the house for an entire day. At first, the anxiety when I walked away from the house was almost unbearable, but it gradually lessened.
As I continued to read and apply the principles I learned, I began to break free from the bondage OCD was imposing on my life. I realize I will probably never be cured
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