Grammie's Primer on Discipline
If whining is your grandchild's way of getting what they want, discourage the whining by ignoring it. The more you give into whining, the more you will have to tolerate the whining, time and time again. Try not to give in, if they want something teach them the proper way to ask, with a "Please, may I have or do...." Explain calmly why you cannot honor their request, and again offer alternatives you are able to give. If a temper tantrum comes up, definitely ignore the behavior. Please put the child in a safe time out spot until they calm down. Again do not give in. Stay calm and tell them, when they stop screaming, you will give them three options to choose from. Giving the child the ability to have a choice activity or item, gives them a reason to regain their own composure and an opportunity to receive something for doing so.
GRANDPARENTING DISCIPLINE BASICS
DO NOT escalate bad behavior by yelling, or threatening. Yelling only reinforces the bad behavior. Threatening just pushes the child to see if you will carry out the threat. If you don't follow through, the child has won on some level.
DO NOT give in after you have already said NO. If you give in, it sends a mixed message about your authority and down plays your own respect for your wishes.
DO NOT over rule or dismiss the parents' authority and wishes by saying YES or giving something to your grandchild that their parents have already said NO to.
DO NOT display bad behaviors, such as heated arguments, swearing, hitting, throwing things, or drinking and drug use in front of your grandchildren. They learn by your examples, if they witness bad behaviors in your home, chances are they will believe it's okay to act or do those things.
DO NOT make promises you cannot keep. Doing so questions your word and honesty. An unintentional form of lying and a threat to your grandchild's trust in you.
DO NOT over react by excessive punishment, like not talking to your grandchild for weeks, not allowing them to visit, or just by holding a grudge. Deal with the situation and let go of it.
DO discourage unacceptable behaviors by ignoring them, or simply stating you are disappointed. Tell your grandchild you do not like that particular behavior, but you love them. Defuse the bad and go on to something more acceptable
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