To Speak or Not to Speak: Creating Dazzling Dialogue, Part II
asked. If the dialogue tag comes before the line, set it off with a comma. John said, "I'm going home!" Exclamation points, like profanity, should be used sparingly to maintain their effectiveness.
There is debate over how to indicate thoughts or internal monologue. Thoughts should never be in quotation marks. Some editors prefer them in regular type, not set apart from the rest of the text. Others prefer thoughts to be in italics. The major problem with using italics is if you have a large block of italics, it is difficult on the eyes. For thoughts spanning multiple paragraphs, it is probably best not to use italics. If it's just a line or two, italics is probably fine. The trend seems to be moving toward a preference of standard type so when in doubt, omit the italics and use a dialogue tag such as "she thought."
DOs and DON'Ts of Good Dialogue
DON'T use stilted or formal language. Most people use slang, contractions, and sentence fragments. We do not always speak as properly as we write.
DO use body language and gestures to enhance your speech. This helps convey emotion and is particularly effective when the character isn't telling the truth. While lying to his wife about working late, a man might look down or fidget. This shows the reader that the speaker's words are unreliable.
DON'T make your dialogue echo your narrative. For example: Alice was coming down with a cold. "I think I'm getting a cold," she said.
DO make sure your characters have something to say before letting them speak. All dialogue should have a purpose. Mindless chatter will do nothing but slow down the pace of your novel.
DON'T use cliches unless you have a character who uses them continuously. It is okay if using cliches is a vocal trait of that character. Another exception is if you twist them so the result is unexpected. For instance, after a long speech, a character might say, "That's my four cents," instead of "two cents."
DO consider to whom the character is speaking. People use different words and different tones when speaking to children, their spouse, and their boss.
DON'T use filler words like "um," "uh," "well," and "you know," unless it is a vocal trait of a particular character. Otherwise, it slows down the dialogue.
DO read your dialogue out loud. It will give you a better idea of whether or not it sounds natural and will also
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