infant). Then in one of my nursing pamphlets I noticed a drawing of a side lying nursing position. "Can I do that?" I thought.
After three sleepless nights in a rocking chair in the nursery across the hall, pillows up to my armpits, I was sure that I would try
anything just to get back into my own bed. I nursed her in bed until she fell asleep and then gently lifted her tiny resting
body onto my chest where she remained and slept for four hours. Ah, sleep, precious sleep! I felt her gentle stirring and heard
her little grunts and woke to nurse her again until she fell back to sleep for several more hours. When morning came and I felt
rested and ready to take on the day it felt like a dream! My husband was in awe -- he had nine hours of uninterrupted sleep.
We were hooked. The baby was happy and we were well rested. However, there was still a nagging little voice inside my head
reminding me that this was not "normal". I knew of other parents who bragged about their babies "sleeping through the night" in
their cribs at 3 weeks old. One mother told me it was hard the first four nights to hear her baby's cries over the baby monitor --
but then the fifth night, the baby cried for only a little while and then "put herself to sleep". I couldn't help thinking that she hadn't "put herself to sleep" -- she had lost faith in her own mother -- she finally realized that her cries would never be answered -- that her tears and fears would never be comforted or soothed. How sad! The
thought of allowing my daughter to cry herself into a frenzy night after night until she finally gave up after learning that her cries
would not get a response from her parents seemed wrong. I knew in my heart it was wrong. So, about once a week after
the baby fell asleep I would get up and lay her in the crib (which we moved into our bedroom and had been serving mainly as a
very pretty changing table) and let her sleep on her own until she woke up and realized we were not near. As soon as I heard
her cry I would bring her back to bed with us and vow never to leave her alone in her crib again. How could nurturing and
loving your child at night be so abnormal?
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