It is a different story in the Sudan, however, where a new mother receives treatment similar to that of a new bride, free for the most part to relax, eat well and beautify herself. For forty days after delivery, a woman can usually depend upon her own mother and other female relatives to pamper her to the point where her only responsibility is to breastfeed her baby, which will be brought to her at the appropriate times by one of her many caretakers, even at night.
Fenugreek* (helba in Arabic) is believed to increase the amount of milk a woman produces and is a must in the Sudanese woman's post-partum diet. Prepared as a sumptuous pudding, she will eat it daily as friends, neighbors and relatives provide her with a constant supply of it. Not only with this increase her flow of milk, but it will also make her fatter, something many Sudanese consider desireable.
Other beautification rituals include yellowing the skin by sitting for hours each day in smoke from a special kind of tree bark which is burned like incense, applying intricate henna designs to hands and feet and removing any unwanted hair from the body, all of which mirror the preparations a woman makes before getting married. By the time her forty days are over, the Sudanese woman is feeling well-rested, clean and beautiful and is ready to begin her life as a mother to a new baby and to resume her old responsibilities as a wife.
Most, if not all, women need help after giving birth, although many feel too shy to request it. That is why it should be up to the post-partum woman's friends and relatives to give help without being asked.
Many tight-knit communities of Muslim women in America are very organized when it comes to the pampering of new mothers, cooking hearty meals for the woman and her family, performing household chores, taking care of her other children, etc. If this is not the case in your particular community, why not start the next time a sister has a baby? Muslim women here are often without their families, either because they have come from another country or state, or because their families have not accepted them as Muslims. A major life-changing event such as the birth of a baby, the happiness of which one naturally longs to share with those close to her, can bring on feelings of sadness and isolation in such cases. Having sisters around who genuinely care can make all the difference in the world.
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