Imagining what we hope to be and taking every little step needed to get there will get you where you want to go eventually. Unfortunately, that wonderful imagination that allows us to write such good music can also be our worst enemy. Here are a few ways to get around this situation.
WHAT YOU FOCUS ON EXPANDS
This is a favorite quote of motivational gurus, and true for most musicians. If you've decided that you just can't play guitar, you can't. If you have decided that you'll never win any awards because of whatever you won't. This is usually because your mind is really good at creating whatever reality you tell it to, and will actually do things to trip you up to make this reality come about. It is actually more emotionally healthy to imagine the very best situation, and find out just how you can do what it is you want to do, and make those all important lists of what needs to be done yet. If you run into a situation where you find yourself saying "I can't," step back, ask yourself why, and you'll often find that you are simply taking too big a step all at once, and need to do one or several pre-steps first so you can get to the point you want. Once you reach each teeny goal, make sure you reward yourself in some healthy way, like allowing yourself to rent a video, see a local friend play a gig, have a really big salad or something that will help you reach your songwriting goals, not do yet something else that will deplete your pocketbook or hurt your health and trip yourself up yet again.
IT ISN'T SCARY-IT REALLY ISN'T
Many of us have heard that cute way to describe FEAR-False Expectations Appearing Real. It really is true-many of the things we are scared of really don't exist except in our emotions. Sure, folks may heckle you, but maybe everyone will cheer you on, instead-you won't know if you don't try. In a lot of cases, you're scared to perform because you haven't rehearsed enough, so rehearse! Practice with pals or pals over, practice playing softly on your apartment balcony to your neighbors if you can. If you are prepared, your confidence will soar, and you just won't feel scared, because you can do that stuff in your sleep. If you find yourself freezing up, just keep going, because chances are, especially if you are doing an original, people will think that you MEANT to have that quaver in your voice, or that pause in your song, because they've never heard it, so have no idea that you just fluffed. Go with pals, too-it never hurts to have some ringers in the audience that will cheer you on, or have you return the favor.
