I do not now, nor have I ever claimed to be an authority on MPD or anything else. What I write comes as the result of my own experience and the insights and processes that have helped me in my own recovery. I seek only to share my experience, strength and hope with others. Therefore, if something I state rubs you the wrong way or you feel uncomfortable with any part of it, feel free to disregard any or all of it. |
The whole of life boils down to one thing, choices. From the day we are born we begin making choices. Of course, the choices we make as children are based upon what brings us pleasure, and what brings us that which we do not like. I won't say that children always attempt avoid pain, because often they don't. Often children will choose the most painful route, simply because it is an experience they have known and lived with since birth and they are not afraid of it. Children who have been battered since infancy, for instance, will often choose pain over pleasure, because pain has come to signify love to them. What children will avoid, in almost every case, is that which separates them from what they consider to be a bond and attention. Above all else, children need to bond and they need attention to survive.During world war two, after the Blitz in England, there were hundreds of children and babies orphaned. Many of these children were placed in "crèches" or child care centers. Often there were just too many children for those adults who worked in these crèches to care for on an individual basis. What was discovered as the result of this was that those children who were held, fondled and paid attention to at least once a day survived, and those children who were just cared for, in mechanical ways, fed, bathed and placed back in their beds, did not survive. All the children were given good nutrition, and kept clean, but some only received minimal contact, and those children, generally infants, would die for seemingly no apparent reason. What was discovered out of this was that children need to "bond" with at least one other human being, and that bonding was not dependent on loving kindness so much as consistency of contact. Those babies that cried often and were hit or slapped to quiet them, survived, and those babies who did not cry, and therefore were left alone, simply died in their silent sleep. Therefore, one of the most basic needs for human survival is constant contact, whether
