Avery: There is a sensitivity thing that some people have. I don't have it. I don't cry at movies, I don't gush over babies, I don't buy Christmas presents five months early, and I don't tell the guy who ruined both our lives, "Oh poor baby." But I do love you.
Jerry: I don't like black people? I am Mister black people.
Bob Sugar: It's not "show friends". It's "show business".
Jerry: I'm still sort of moved by your "my word is stronger than oak" thing.
Laurel Boyd: Don't cry at the beginning of a date. Cry at the end, like I do.
Jerry: That's more than a dress. That's an Audrey Hepburn movie.
Dorothy: I love him! I love him for the man he wants to be. I love him for the man he almost is.
Jerry: Have you ever gotten the feeling that you aren't completely embarrassed yet, but you glimpse tomorrow's embarrassment?
Ray Boyd: Did you know that the human head weighs 8 pounds?
Jerry: Did you know that Troy Aikman, in only six years, has passed for 16,303 yards?
Ray Boyd: did you know that bees and dogs can smell fear?
Jerry: Did you know that the career record for hits is 4,256 by Pete Rose who is not in the Hall of Fame?
Ray Boyd: Did you know my next door neighbor has three rabbits?
Jerry: I, I can't compete with that!
Tidwell: I've got a shelf life of ten years tops. My next contract's gotta bring me the dollars that'll last me and mine a long time...I'm out of this sport in 5 years. What's my family gonna live on, huh?
Dorothy: Look at me Laurel. I'm the oldest 26 year old in the world.
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