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Halloween! Scary, Isn't It?


© Holly Gumpher

Halloween can be a scary time.....for parents! What are the kids going to be this year? How are you ever going to put a costume together using just duct tape and staples? Do you really want to spend $29.95 on a store-bought costume? The bravest of moms and dads, the ones who throw birthday parties for 12 little guests and willingly go on camp outs in the spooky woods, even they tremble at the thought of Halloween!

Consider this frightening scenario:

Martha Stewart Halloween: The whole family transforms into Scooby Doo and the gang. I become Daphne (hey, I'm dreaming here, and Martha can work wonders) complete with the red hair and green scarf. My husband becomes Fred, including the nice neckerchief and announcing loudly every three minutes, "I've got an idea!" My younger daughter will be Velma, since she'll enjoy wearing knee socks and no one else will. My older daughter will have to be Shaggy, which she won't mind since she thinks she owns Scooby Doo anyway. I guess we'll have to rent a big brown dog for the night and paint our white van that groovy green, flower power design. Then we can cruise the neighborhood and beg for candy to eat since we've spent the grocery money for the month on costumes.

Ok, it's over. Uncover your eyes. Now I'll tell you what our kids will really be this Halloween and you'll see how much less scary it can be!

Our older daughter wants to be a skeleton. No problem. She'll wear a black turtlenck, black leggings and a pair of her dad's old black socks over her shoes. I'll cut bones out of white felt, and tack them onto her clothes (ok, this requires needle and thread but only the most basic skill with it). She can wear a black hat and either paint her face white or wear a white mask.

Our younger daughter wants to be a black cat. Once again, the black turtleneck, leggings and socks. We can buy her ears and tail in any discount department store, and paint whiskers on her face.

Voila, two satisfied trick or treaters. Not up to Martha's standards, I'll admit, but it should do the trick. And best of all, scary Halloween nightmares aren't keeping me up this year!

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