Housewoman

On hands and knees, I scrub the toilet inside and out, nabbing all of the loose hair, dust and general bathroom build-up. My hair falls and sticks to my face, tickling my eyes; my back and knees ache as I bow to the bowl. But it needs to be done; someone has got to do it. There are certain tasks that I loathe, and cleaning the toilet is at the top of the list. I have reflected upon this and I’ve come to the conclusion that it is not the act itself but what it represents, at least to me. Housework in general is a subject not often discussed. It symbolises domesticity and degradation (not to mention scum and grime). Although most of us take part in some type of housework on a daily basis, we behave like our bathrooms, similar to our lives, are always tidy. As a stay-at-home mother, housework is a significant matter. For the sake of practicality, I do most of the cleaning and I cook most of the meals. I don’t consider this degrading, or subservient. My partner works each day, and I’ve included certain domestic tasks into the work I do while caring for my daughter. The silence surrounding these household tasks is what irks me, as though admitting I scrub toilets would somehow invalidate the importance of my role as caregiver and mother. Nobody tells me to clean, I do not earn a wage; in fact, I could just as easily choose to live in the messiness. I admit, I don’t often share that part of my day with anyone. I don’t boast about my freshly dusted shelf or watered plants and when company calls, I act like my house is always sparkling.

The media continues to bombard us with images of women on their hands and knees. Mr. Clean continues to come to our rescue. In most advertisements for household products, it is the woman, the wife, and the mother, who are doing the work. It is ingrained in our culture that men are messy and women are tidy. Women are essential to an orderly home. Men continue to be helpless victims. Our mothers sorted the socks, the underpants and ironed the shirts. It is no wonder women of my generation are confused about the politics of housework. The media continues to promote inequality, our mothers continue to serve our fathers and our husbands and partners continue to be vulnerable. And so we are left with silence. Yet somehow, grudgingly and shamefully we divide the tasks, and our houses stay relatively intact.

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