His Mother

Is your mother-in-law the one that the jokes and cliché's are about? If not that is terrific. However, it can often times be difficult to get along with or even tolerate 'the other woman' in your husband's life. This is especially difficult if she is having a hard time 'letting go' or has a controlling personality.

In all likelihood, she is not all bad since she did help raise a terrific man or in the very least contributed to his genetic make-up. If she did have a great deal to do with raising your dear husband, she probably knows him as well as, if not better than, you do. If this is the case, she can become a great asset to your learning more about what makes this wonderful man tick.

If she is having a difficult time 'letting go' perhaps, you can try sympathizing, especially if you have children. Let her feel needed, so long as that does not develop into a controlling need. Ask her advice when planning a special occasion or meal for your husband. If your mother-in-law does have a controlling personality, your best bet is to ignore it when possible. Make every attempt to shirk off negative comments. However, from the get-go stand your ground. After all you and your husband are adults in charge of your own lives. It is important for you and your spouse to have a united front. Show your appreciation for any helpful suggestions. If you do not agree with her let her know why.

We do not live near my husband's mother and they never have been emotionally close. We do make every effort to visit when we are in the area so that our children have the opportunity to establish a relationship with their grandmother (Grandpa passed away a couple years ago). In all honesty, we make the visits brief; I think she prefers this as much as we do. Nevertheless, my husband and I feel our children have every right to know their grandmother and certainly vice versa.

For more tips and information, I highly recommend checking out www.inlawinfo.com. The site, operated by a mother and daughter in-law team, offers a one of a kind look at this relationship.

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