Think about it. You have studied for a number of years, you sit in an office to which someone comes (to YOU) for help. They have a problem, you are going to solve it. It stands to reason – you must be the expert.
BUT YOU ARE NOT. What do you know about this person, besides what they choose to tell, your first impressions...? You know someone else with EXACTLY the same sort of problem – but it is not (exactly the same, I mean). The husband is different. They live in a different type of community. The parents and parents-in-law are different. The support system is different.
The problem is similar. But not the same.
Nevertheless, you have also read a multitude of papers on this type of situation, and have given a number of speeches at gatherings. You know what you are talking about, and you know how to solve this problem. Or do you rather know how to help the person solve their own problem?
Recently, I received an email, with a number of quotes from a person called Andy Rooney. One of these quotes was "I have learned that it is better to be kind than to be right". And I think that therapy needs to fall into this category too.
We all, eventually, come to our own conclusions. We all, deep down, know the route which is best for us. But sometimes, we need to be freed into taking this route. We need someone to say it is OK to do what we are doing. Someone to sift through our mess and ask us how we became so knowledgeable about... bad relationships... failed businesses... difficult children... coping with stress in the way that we do... whatever. The fact that the outcome of some of our actions may not be perfect is not the issue.
Go To Page: 1 2
| Here's the follow-up discussion on this article: | View all related messages |
For a complete listing of article comments, questions, and other discussions related to Bronwen Schoombie's Counselling/Therapy topic, please visit the Discussions page.