How Do You Feel?

It happens to us every day: Some well-meaning (or completely insensitive) person says "How do you feel?" or "How are you?" If you're like most lupies, your first reaction is to either swear at them like a sailor, or tell them to sit down, since you're going to be there for a while.

So, "How do you feel?"

There are so many variables on all of the answers to this question, I won't go into every one, for fear of losing you completely, but let's break it down into manageable parts, shall we?

• Physically

  Our bodies, Our enemies. At least sometimes, right? One day we can feel almost "normal", and go about our daily business none the worse for wear, maybe a little twinge here and there, but pretty okay. The next day, we're crying into our pillows and begging for someone to help us get up to the bathroom.

  We may spend all day in bed, sleeping off the bone-crushing fatigue that hits us, only to pop up at 5:00 pm, feeling tons better, and ready to cook dinner for 10. We meet a friend at the market who says, "You look fabulous! Let's go to lunch!" and have to reply, "Sorry, I'm just off to my dialysis (or chemo) appointment."

  There simply isn't any way to predict how our bodies are going to feel, or even look. The only constant that I have noticed, in my experience, is the lousier I feel, the better I look. (Low-grade fevers make my cheeks rosy and my eyes sparkle -- Go fig.)

  While it makes for "adventuresome" living, it can make it more difficult to make plans for social events, or even for grocery shopping. We have to learn to listen to our bodies and adapt our plans to how we're feeling at any given time. That may mean having understanding friends and family when we have to change a sit-down dinner party to a potluck supper. It may also mean investing in a video camcorder in order to be able to watch Junior's breakout performance as a rutabaga in the first grade play. These adaptations do not make us horrible, selfish people. They allow us to participate in life at our own pace, just like everyone else.

• Mentally

  Of course, everyone has days that they feel that the men in white coats are just around the next corner, waiting to pounce and whisk them off to a comfy padded room. However, I think that we lupies do much more soul-searching when it comes to evaluating our own mental status.

  The copyright of the article How Do You Feel? in Lupus is owned by Karyn Moran Holton. Permission to republish How Do You Feel? in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.

  Go To Page: 1 2 3

  Articles in this Topic    Discussions in this Topic