Friendship Hardships, Part Two

Is it that time of year or something? So many people I'm talking to are having problems with their friends. Fights, betrayal, hurt...it seems to be everywhere.

It happens to all of us, I suppose. Some people are meant to stay in our lives, and some are meant to go. No one knows how long a person is supposed to stay in their lives. We seem to have to wander through these days, wondering if the people we hold dear are only supposed to be temporary fragments of lasting friendships.

Sometimes, however, it is good to let people go. It may not feel good to let them go, but friendships, and all relationships for that matter, are here to nurture us. When the nurturing, mutual respect and caring stop, it may be time to consider if the friend is worth keeping.

I have always been an advocate for cutting ties with a person who is no good for you. It makes me feel bad sometimes, to remember those over the years I have "cut loose." But I am confident that those decisions were reached for a reason. There are also those in my life who I have restored friendships with. Deciding what to do, based on the person, and the relationship is key to overcoming friendship hardships.

Sometimes, you know that a person is worth keeping in your life, and may wonder how to get through an argument, or disagreement. The issue of betrayal in ones life is never easy, and neither is deciding whether or not to keep someone who betrayed you in your life.

When you are the one in the deciding seat, it's even harder.

I can only offer you some self-exploration questions to help you see your way through such tough times.

1. Do you think the friend is worth keeping? Why or why not? What steps will you need to take to find out if your friend is worth holding onto?

2. In what ways has he or she been a good friend to you? What ways has he or she been a bad friend?

3. Do you see anything in yourself that has contributed to the problem? Be honest!

4. What would you and the friend need to do to continue with the friendship if you decide to?

5. Step a year into the future. As it stands now, what would your relationship be like? What if he or she was not in your life? What if he or she was?

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