The Real Truth About Lesbian Love

Let's face it, these times of political correctness can be hard on curious folks. There are questions you may just be dying to ask, but you're afraid you might get your face slapped...or worse, be labeled a homophobe. Or a homophile.

It is to the curious-but clueless-that I dedicate these questions and answers about the secret rituals and symbols of lesbian life.

Is it okay to call a lesbian a dyke?

Not unless you're another dyke.

Who was Sappho?

If you've spent any time at all around lesbians, you know that most of us either have, have had, or are planning to have, a cat, a dog, or more rarely a snake named Sappho. If we've had a few beers or other...er...relaxing substances, you might also hear us making some pretty awful puns about being "sapphisticated." (That's a fancy way of saying we're dykes.)

For all of this adulation, the historical Sappho, a poet who lived on the Isle of Lesbos during the early seventh century B.C., remains something of a mystery. Although clearly a respected artist in her time (Plato once called her the "tenth muse"), only a fraction of her poetry remains to us. That poetry is clearly homoerotic.

The details of Sappho's life, unfortunately, are sketchy. Most scholars agree that she came from a prosperous family and spent most of her life on Lesbos, acting as a patron to women who became her friends and lovers before they went off to marry men. A few contend Sappho herself was married and had a child; some legends even have her killing herself out of unrequited love for a man (not her alleged husband). The rare academic even claims that Sappho had no same-sex interest at all, that her poetry about women is simply a traditional expression of admiration.

See what you think:

I have not had one word from her
Frankly I wish I were dead
When she left she wept
a great deal; she said to me, "This parting must be
endured, Sappho. I go unwillingly."
I said, "Go and be happy
but remember (you know
well) whom you leave shackled by love."

--Translated by Mary Barnard

A traditional expression of appreciation. Yeah, right.

What's the gay agenda?

Search me. A cynic might say that the so-called "gay agenda" is a fictional plot, hatched by homophobic idiots with too much time on their hands, for the sole purpose of trying to make heterosexual people scared of lesbians and gays.

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