Foundations of Japanese etiquette -- a primer

If you compliment a senior, he may take it as an insult. Remember that Japan is very rank-conscious, and you could be seen as being judgemental of a senior, even if you are judging him well. It just isn't your place. These kind of compliments have to be carefully crafted and very low-key. "Wow, you're really good at that!" becomes, "I learned a lot from watching you."

If you compliment the appearance of a woman other than your wife/girlfriend, your motives may well be viewed with suspicion. It's a fairly male-dominated society (outside the home ONLY!), and saying things to your secretary like, "You look great today!" well... it's just not done.

If you compliment your wife/girlfriend's appearance, be prepared to explain yourself for a good half-hour. It would be good to have alibis for the previous seven days.

Different Games, Different Rules : Why Americans and Japanese Misunderstand Each Other
Haru Yamada / Hardcover / Published 1997
Estimated Price: $16.80

Behind the Japanese Bow; An In-Depth Guide to Understanding and Predicting Japanese Behavior
Boye De Mente / Paperback / Published 1993
Estimated Price: $11.96

Discover Japan : Words, Customs, and Concepts Vol 2
Japan Culture Institute, International Limited Kodansha / Paperback / Published 1988
Estimated Price: $8.00

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