The end of the road in Buddhist Japan

Flash forward again, now, to the crematorium, where I and my mother-in-law picked up the same bone with our chopsticks and moved it from the temporary container to the ceremonial vessel that would be kept on a shrine at my in-laws’ house until the 49th day from her passing, when they would be ceremoniously buried next to her husband, my wife’s o-jii-chan. This part of the funeral ritual is the reason one should never pass food to another person directly chopstick-to-chopstick, but rather should set the food down to be picked up by the other person. I mentally noted how thin, light and frail the bone felt at the end of my big steel chopsticks. I was, in fact, feeling very clinical about the whole process.

Perhaps that was because – though this was my first time at the crematorium – it was actually my second Buddhist funeral. When my wife’s aunt had died of cancer shortly after our wedding, I attended the first two parts of the ceremony, which were far more unsettling to me that first time around than viewing o-ba-chan’s bones.

You see, in Japan, if the body is presentable it is delivered back to the family by the funeral home as soon as the officials are done with it. It is then placed on the tatami floor of a room that the family has prepared for it, and is covered only by sheets. Incense is burned next to the corpse, and a watch of sorts is posted through the night to make sure the incense never burns out before another is lit. (The priest, by way of explanation, said only that the smell of incense attracts the attention of the gods and Buddhas.) The family then eats a meal in full view of the corpse, making occasional trips to its side to refresh the incense, add a gift of flowers or a favorite food, ring the small chime and offer prayers.

This usually lasts only one night, and then an open-casket ceremony is held for all the friends and relatives, sometimes at the house, sometimes at a funeral home. However, if an unlucky day (see the Lucky Days article) will interfere, the body might have to lie in the house an extra day. The ceremony itself is a grand Buddhist ritual, with the body in either an open or windowed casket, surrounded by white lilies, fruits, favorite foods or items,

Go To Page: 1 2 3 4 5

Articles in this Topic    Discussions in this Topic