Although many parents will argue that their child is well-behaved because he fears punishment, I believe that the most important determiner is whether the parents exhibit the above behaviors. The majority of kids who stay in trouble at school are the same ones who receive plenty of physical punishment at home. But find a well-behaved child and you'll almost always find parents who devote their time and attention to their children creating a stable, consistent environment with realistic expectations. Is this outcome guaranteed? No, partly because kids have different personalities and activity levels. But gentleness, patience, and a proactive approach to discipline go a long way toward helping a child feel good about himself and his interactions with others. He will even take pride in knowing that he can conduct himself with courtesy and respect.
For an expert explanation of grace-based discipline or a Christian perspective on "sparing the rod" visit Pastor Crystal Lutton's site http://www.aolff.org/ You can also buy her book on grace-based discipline, Biblical Parenting, there.
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