In our culture it's popular to think that the end justifies the means--to think, for instance that letting a baby cry-it-out alone in his bed justifies the end of potentially having a baby who sleeps through the night at a young age. This pragmatic attitude is also seen when parents let their baby cry and refuse to feed him even when he shows clear hunger cues such as gnawing on his fists in order to get him on a schedule (or to show their baby who is boss) or slaps their exploring baby's hand to keep him from touching something breakable. These attitudes toward parenting little children have led to a society that doesn't realize the treasure that children are. This society expects even babies to comfort themselves and forces unnatural and dangerous independence on children who are not ready. We have children who are turning earlier and earlier to drugs, smoking, and boyfriends and girlfriends to find the love and acceptance they don't find at home.
There has got to be a better way, a more gentle, attached way of parenting that will bring better results. Many parents feel they have found this way. It is an ancient, beautiful, natural way of parenting, and it often goes by the term "attachment parenting" because it helps to build a healthy, strong attachment between children and their parents. The phrase "attachment parenting" was coined by pediatrician and father of eight William Sears. It has come to mean many different things to different people, but it basically means trying to get to really know your baby and trying to meet his needs in the best way possible. This involves listening to your heart, a.k.a., your mothering instincts, so this type of parenting is sometimes referred to as "instinctive parenting."
