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Ezzo Parenting

© Jeri Carr

Gary and Anne Marie Ezzo, the founders of Growing Families International (GFI) and the authors of many books/parenting manuals such as Growing Kids God's Way, Preparation for Parenting, and On Becoming Babywise I & II, offer parenting advice that provides parents with a plan whereby they can control their baby's sleep and feeding habits from a very early age. This plan works with all babies (or so they say), and with their program both parents and babies will be more rested and content.

Sound too good to be true? Take a look and see for yourself...

The Ezzos' parenting philosophy as it pertains to infants centers around their belief that children should be fed on a parent-directed feeding schedule, or "PDF." They add to that the teaching that things should be done in a certain order; that order being feeding, waketime, and sleep. They ridicule those who "demand-feed" their babies--a term they define as feeding in response to a baby's cries (many mothers find this definition of "demand-feed" to be inaccurate, and prefer to feed their baby "on-cue"--when they show signs of hunger).

Feeding a baby when the parents say it's time rather than following their baby's cues can be dangerous for breastfed babies and have a negative impact on the breastfeeding relationship. The American Academy of Pediatrics believes babies should be fed on demand, and in their policy on Breastfeeding and the Use of Human Milk they state, "Newborns should be nursed whenever they show signs of hunger, such as increased alertness or activity, mouthing, or rooting. Crying is a late indicator of hunger."

The Ezzos don't appear to be that concerned with the cries of a newborn, because, as long as parents follow their plan, then presumably all the baby's needs will have been met. A new mother who hears her baby cry may feel compelled to answer, but the Ezzos feel that responding with your emotions is wrong.

But is it wrong? When a mother follows her heart and responsively meets her baby's needs, it creates harmony and a feeling of rightness between a mother and child. A baby communicates that he has a need when he cries; a new mother has a mothering insinct that compels her to answer his cries, and thus through her loving response she fulfills two very real needs: 1) her inborn need to nurture and protect her baby and 2) her baby's need to be taken care of and to be near to her. A mother's body, too, encourages her to answer her baby's cries for often a mother's milk lets down in response to his cries, and the "mothering hormones," prolactin and oxytocin--hormones released while breastfeeding--promote the desire to nurture and protect.

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