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The Mind-set for Infant Potty Training

© Laurie Boucke

It takes a certain mind-set to use and complete infant potty training (IPT). For wisdom and inspiration about this mind-set, we can turn to mothers in non-Western societies where IPT has been the norm for centuries--in Asia, Africa, parts of South America and the Polar Regions. The attitude of these women is the key to their success.

The following compares and contrasts the approaches by, and attitudes of, non-Western and Western women vis-a-vis toilet training. The information is of a general nature. The first half applies to many (but, of course, not all) women in traditional societies, and the second half to Western women. It is meant to provide an alternative outlook, spark ideas and provide encouragement.

WOMEN IN NON-WESTERN SOCIETIES:

** expect to handle their baby's elimination without diapers from birth or the early months of life

** are relaxed and nonchalant about elimination, accidents and the like

** do not view elimination as disgusting

** encourage their babies to use their "toilet muscles" from early infancy

** do not use diapers (especially in villages and rural areas)

** know when their babies need to eliminate and help them to a toilet place

** recognize and respond to their babies' communications

** are very in tune with their babies, often on an intuitive level

** obtain help and support from siblings and other women

** are extremely attentive to all their babies' needs

** remain in physical or close contact as long as their babies desire

** generally complete toilet training their babies between 9-15 months

IN WESTERN SOCIETY, MANY OF US:

** are so programmed to make a big deal out of toilet training that we make it a big deal

** assume a baby is unaware of elimination from birth

** train our babies to use a diaper as a toilet

** condition our infants to not care about being wet or soiled

** ignore elimination (by letting diapers deal with it) until our children are 2-3 years old

** believe (thanks to doctors in bed with the diaper industry) that babies cannot have any control over elimination until they are 2 years or older

** expect to use full-time diapers for 2 or more years

** expect our children to "self-train" in just a few days around 2-3 years old (true for some but certainly not all children)

** fear we will harm our babies if we start toilet training in early infancy

** view elimination as "yucky" and disgusting

** do not realize that babies in many non-Western countries are toilet trained by age 9-15 months

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