Sympathy The Never Ending Cycle

Welcome back to RoseMeade's Wellness Nook. RoseMeade has chosen to return to the style of characterization in order to show how the disease of hypochondria can show up in one's life by using the act of getting sympathy.

Patsy Hill is our character today. The Hill family raised her in a manner that reinforced her need for sympathy. 'Poor Patsy' was an endearment used in the Hill's home to describe Patsy. They were words used to indicate she was unable to accomplish or attempt a goal in life that would appear normal to others. When Patsy was not invited to parties, she would hear from her invalid mother, "Poor Patsy, you deserve to be invited honey, those kids are just being mean." Patsy's cold and uncaring father was often heard saying, "Poor Patsy, you probably won't be able to go out for cheerleader this year with a flat chest like that one!" Earl, Patsy's fourteen year old brother added on a daily basis his viewpoint with statements like, "Poor Patsy, you at least can leave home before me and get away from dad's cruelty. Not that you could ever be happy, but at least you'll be gone from this hell hole." The 'icing on the cake' came from the youngest member of the Hill family, Samantha (Sammy for short.) Sammy turned five and usually behaved as a fifteen-year-old would, 'an adult before her time.' Sammy constantly rang in the truth by chiming in statements like, "Poor Patsy, too bad mom makes you do the cooking and cleaning. I can not believe she even makes you give dad backrubs. I hope I never learn how to do those things and that way mom will never ask me to do them instead of you."

The scenery was set with the household reeking of dysfunction. The Hill family lived revolving around feeling sorry for Patsy. This specifically created an ambiance of how everyone supported her. People showed Patsy love, comfort and care by saying, "Poor Patsy," and probably could not imagine really showing love to her any other way. The problems were rampant. Mom actually put sixteen year old Patsy in charge of the house. Patsy began 'wearing the apron strings by cooking, cleaning and making the house run smooth. These ended up being the only things Patsy thought she could do well.

A warning sign was that dad was getting back rubs from his sixteen year old daughter. This behavior seemed to be incest of the subtle nature. Dad threw out innuendoes about other men not wanting flat-chested women and this verbal message set up a defeatist pattern. The teen that resulted was one being taught in some ways that there was no reason for her to believe in herself. Patsy's siblings did not respect her and they pitied her instead. Low self-esteem was only a part of the sickness.

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