Are You Tolerating or Loving the Hypochondriac?
Deep down inside the heart of a hypochondriac, they believe that they are truly ill and are suffer from an illness. Some believe that they have pain daily or even hourly. There are those who believe that death beckon their doorsteps.
It is not my suggestion that you believe these people are ill. I am not suggesting that you believe that they are dying. Instead, I implore you to believe and try your best to become convinced that they believe in their illness. There is a difference. Realizing this difference could bring about a miracle.
Acting as if they are lying about their complaints only causes harm and furthers the illness itself. Compassion and tolerance are truly opposites. Treating them tenderly will embrace the human who is suffering. Compassion will not cause the illness to worsen. It is my contention that loving and taking the time to be caring will actually help the 'ill one' to heal. The love and compassion and certainly, the interest you show them, will help the hypochondriac to relax. Try responding to their complaints by placing your hand upon shoulders. Touch the tops of the hands of chronic complainers. Kiss someone's cheek when he or she explains to you that death is knocking at his or her door. Stop responding with statements in which you do not believe. This behavior masks tolerant behavior.
Another way to react would be to say, "I care about how you" instead of responding with "I hope that you feel better soon." By setting limits and boundaries of what you will talk about with a hypochondriac, you let them know that you would like to know what else is happening in their life beyond illness.
Encourage them to concentrate upon more than symptoms. In an honest manner, share on topics that bring about a true caring interaction that has nothing to do with illness. The less the illness is focused upon, the more relaxed the relationship will become. True healing and the opportunity for the 'ill one' to focus upon other types of conversations will begin. New patterns will arrive and living with the hypochondriac will become easier for everyone involved... especially for them.
I leave you with some words to ponder: Would you rather treat someone with tolerance, act as if you are enduring them, or seem as if you are avoiding the 'ill one?' On the other hand, would you rather treat someone with endearment,
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