Dear Reena--a column for the lovelorn and confused Equine

Okay, folks, let's have some fun. I am going to try something new. Let's have a little fun here with a new, semi weekly column called DEAR REENA--LETTERS FROM LOVELORN AND OTHERWISE CHALLENGED EQUINES. That's right, Reena has seen Dear Abby columns, and has decided to start one for horses. SO, if your horse wants a question answered, advise for a neglected heart, or just wants to be semi-famous, drop us a line at reena@lhasas.org . But be prepared: horse hooves are HELL on a keyboard!

Dear Reena:

I am a wonderful, handsome 10 year old Stallion with a problem. Ever since the vet came out a few years ago and put me to sleep, I have not been able to convince the mares that I am a stallion! I live with several mares, and when I try to herd them like the Herd Stallion I am, they laugh at me and call me a "silly gelding" This really hurts my feeling, what can I do to convince then that I am just as manly as I ever was?

Shooting Blanks

Dear Shooting Blanks:

Well, first of all, let me tell you........STALLIONS DON"T RATE! Even if the vet hadn't done a little "nip and tuck" on you, it is not the stallion that makes the decisions for the herd! We mares understand that males tend to think with their nether regions, so we kindly ALLOW you to think you are leading, when you are really doing EXACTLY what we want you too!

But as to how the mares perceive you, well, maybe you should try playing hard to get....that always works to stimulate curiosity, if for no other reason than we want to know what grass you are hiding we want!

Reena

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