Dream On

You rise from your bed after a wonderful 8 hours of uneventful sleep, rush into your clothes and out the door into the brisk, fresh air. Placing two fingers against your mouth, you whistle shrilly and wait for the answering whinny. On a hill conveniently near your home appears a sleek, magnificent equine shape. He snorts as he canters gracefully to you and then dances in place and shakes his head, snorting in pleasure as you reach into your pocket to retrieve the fresh carrot and sugar cube. Daintily he takes the treats from your hand and then you catch a handful of his mane and swing yourself up onto his back. You cling to his mane and simply think about running and you are off. Galloping across the lush green pasture without a care in the world. You are one with the horse, a single creature running for the pure joy of it, united as one being.

Sounds great, doesn't it? But guess what? It is a total LIE! From the part about getting eight hours of sleep to the "united being," it is all a BIG, FAT, LIE! Even though I would never trade a moment of my life with horses for anything, I have to admit that the tale above is a romantic dream. And a dream of a non-horse-keeping person at that. Those of us lucky enough to share our lives with an equine friend or friends (see a future article about the similarities of horses and potato chips: one is never enough!) know that seldom do we get eight hours of rest without an emergency; which can be as mild as a horse knocking at the door (minor at least to those of us who live in the pasture) to a more serious Houdini-in-the-grain-room-midnight-vet-call kind of emergency. Horses are not known for their ability to get into mischief at convenient moments. They seem to be more mischievous at night, usually just after we have undressed for the shower.

And that part about coming when I whistle? Ha ha ha, now I know it is a dream. If they happen to be there, or if they think you have food, and IF they feel like humoring you, they might consent to be fed or scratched. But if they are not in the mood, or they think you might have some awful idea about making them work, then you won't catch them within a hundred feet of you. A fresh carrots? Not unless you made a special trip to the fridge to get one, and then, there are the horses, like mine, who won't eat anything as a treat unless it comes from a bucket and costs $14.99 for 3 pounds. Even though the ingredients are carrots and apples! Delicately taking the treats from your hand? Dream on! After feeding, be sure to count your fingers and make sure you have the same number coming out as you had going in.

Go To Page: 1 2

Articles in this Topic    Discussions in this Topic