Cabin Fever--Don't Drink The Water

Sit down and shut up, you little monkeys-time for class to begin.

And today in BIOL 305, So You Want to Start A Pandemic, we're going to be watching the Lion's Gate film, Cabin Fever. With loads of special features and subtitles in three different languages, so enjoy safely.

You'll notice that things begin rather simply-five college-age friends go off for a vacation at a cabin in the far-off woods. Two girls, three guys, in a horror movie-anyone think there'll be a lot of SEX in this? Sure there is!

And the vacation gets off to a strange start when one of the characters is bitten in front of a gas station / general store in the middle of nowhere. By a six year old towheaded boy named Dennis. Remember this little psycho towhead. He's going to be important at the end.

Our college characters, meanwhile, gather supplies from the general store. Keep an eye on the elderly gas station attendant...the one who talks about fox urine at length. He's going to be part of a very big joke at the end.

Things are going pretty well out in the woods. Couples couple like an episode of a bad dating show and the fifth wheel is off shooting squirrels in the woods and setting things on fire. Yeah...it's almost idyllic. Or at least as close to idyllic as five college kids who probably couldn't SPELL "idyllic" if there were a free keg riding on it are going to get.

And then trouble starts. Our fifth wheel who went off into the woods to shoot squirrels accidentally wings a homeless guy...who's looking rather wan. And staggering. Red blotches are across his forehead, and he's having a hard time maintaining consciousness.

But, this act is shortly forgotten around a campfire, courtesy of our pyromaniac of a fifth wheel. And the students do what kids do best around a campfire-tell stories laden with gore and roast marshmallows. And then, to make things even better, a refugee from Tony Hawk's Boom Boom Huck Jam Tour shows up...with free weed! And a dog! Named Doctor Mambo....ooookay, things are getting kinda WEIRD in the woods.

A sudden storm blows up, and our skater friend Grim returns into the woods. Soon there's a knock at the cabin door, and the kids go to answer it. Uh oh...surprise, surprise...it's our shot-up homeless derelict! And he's looking pretty BAD. His face is beginning to peel, and he's poised to steal the kids' car. An interesting scene of self-defense kicks up, and ends with the derelict being set on fire.

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