The Seventh Inning Stretch - Page 4
© Joan Archer
With the holidays coming up, I will tell you what I have done specifically for Thanksgiving this year. In years past, I have gotten up early to make a huge dinner for myself, my brother, my husband, my ex-husband, and my four sons. At about two o'clock, we sit down to dinner. Then I would get up, wash those dishes, wait about two hours, serve the pies (which I'd also made) eat, and then wash those dishes. All in all, it was a good twelve to fourteen hour day, cooking and cleaning. I began to really hate the holidays. I was working harder those days than on any other, and really hating my family a lot. (O Devil Resentment!) I also felt shame, for we now have so much-and resentment mixed with shame equals one heck of a fun party guest, doesn't it? I wondered why there were at least six grown and nearly-grown men just as happy as clams to be waited upon hand and foot who never seemed to feel the need to get up off their hindquarters to help me out. Then, it occurred to me that I had never asked them! So I did, and you know it got to the point where I had to throw in the "Well, I guess we could go out to dinner, instead-that would be best for all of us, don't you think?" before they all realized I was SERIOUS. So now we have a compromise-I cook (which I really like to do, actually) and they will get to wash the dishes, pots and pans. This works for me! I failed to realize early on that men are not socialized as women are to hop up from a great meal and say, "Can I help you with the clean up?" This is even after my sons have had their turns at being the family dishwasher. Being guys, I think, they simply decide that if they aren't inclined to do it, they just don't offer. I know some that from now on will be, but it takes a big lever to move a mountain.
I also have a master list of things to accomplish in homeschool for the week, in addition to the daily diary I keep. We have been better able to get our craft things done this year, since I have regular time scheduled to do them, and Jasper is much more interested in what he is learning this year. I have also cleared a designated book case for homeschool items ONLY and now we can get to everything in quick time. This saves me a lot of headaches, because as anyone knows, kids can think of fifty ways to drag their heels anytime they are going to fetch the books for the subjects they don't like so much. It also helps to designate when "school has started" from "school is now over" plus keeps it all out of the husband's way, which he loves.
