If your honey doesn't even look at the honey-do list, don't file for divorce. You can tackle some of those chores yourself. I know - you don't think you're handy with tools. You really don't need to be for some of those outdoor fix-its. You will need a little elbow grease, a few tools, and some confidence.
Your tools will depend on what chore needs to be done. Here is a short list of things you will probably need. For those tree branches, a handsaw. For that hose, a package of hose washers, and maybe a pair of needlenose pliers. A few more "might needs" are two screw drivers, one regular, one Philips head. A hammer will always come in handy. Any other tools you might need will be mentioned where they're needed.
First, let's get to that hose. If it's leaking either where it connects to the spigot, or where you screw on the sprayer, you probably need new washers. No biggy. Make sure you turn off the water before you start disconnecting the ends (unless it's a really hot day, and you need to cool off.) Look into one end of the hose. There should be a washer. If not, you just found the problem. If there is a washer there, take it out. If it's been in there for a long time, you might have to pry it out. Your screw driver should do the trick. Be careful, though, You don't want to bend the metal end, or wreck the threads.
Now if the washer is all dried out, or broken, replace it. Trust me, sometimes it's easier to put one in than get one out. Your package of washers will contain several sized washers. Choose the one that fits your hose. Drop it into the hose end, and gently push it in past the threads. Hook the hose back up, and put the sprayer head. Turn on the water and try it out. You should have no more leak. If not, you may need a new sprayer head.
Now that your confidence is up, let's tackle those tree limbs. Don't run away screaming. If you are careful, you can do the job and walk away with all four of your limbs. If your problem branches are really low, you won't need a ladder. You will need that hand saw, though. Take a hold of the branch you want gone, with one hand. Now, place the saw blade as close to where the branch meets the tree as you can. Hold the saw firmly, and start sawing slowly and steadily. Don't stop, if you can help it. If you do you might have trouble getting started in the same angle again. If the branch isn't too thick it shouldn't take long at all. Try to make the cut as close to the trunk as you can. If you do this, all you will be left with is an even wound, with nothing sticking out. If a small amoun of the branch, remains, carefully saw it off.
