The Night Before Christmas, My Way © by Eileen O'dea
It's the night before Christmas and I am a wreck; My wallet is empty, it just went to heck.
The stockings are hung on the tree by the tips; With buckets below them right under the rips.
The Children are sleeping in Summer pajamas; The box with the flannels is over at Grandma's.
Dad has a miller and I have one too; I just can't rest, I have too much to do.
For out on the lawn is a horrible clutter, Cause two day a go I cleaned out the gutter.
To see if the Christmas lights were all still there; The lawn is a mess but the gutter is bare.
The moon on the breast of the junk on the lawn; causes me to believe I'll be up until dawn.
Away to the kitchen I fly like a flash; Tore open the oven where the dishes are stashed.
I pull out the dishes, turn the oven to bake; I have nut breads and puddings and cookies to make.
I open the freezer and fill up with fear; For what to my wondering eyes should appear?
The turkey is frozen, how could I forget; My excuse not a good one, it must be St. Nick!
More rapid than eagles I shut the small door; I sobbed and I whimpered and fell on the floor.
With a wink of my eye, and a nod of my head; I decide just to bag it and go off to bed.
But then, in a twinkling I hear a loud knock; It's Jeannie, my sister, who lives down the block.
She is dressed all in fur, from her head to her boots; And she's carrying a basket of half eaten fruits.
"Why are you dressed like a deranged little elf"?; I laugh as I ask her, in spite of myself.
She speaks not a word and goes straight for my throat; And utters some words I'd rather not quote.
"I came over to tell you my kids wrecked my fruit; Your gift isn't ready, oh yea it's a suite.
"Oh Sissy!" she wails "I'm really behind; I have cards to address and stockings to find."
"Your centerpiece isn't so jerky; It wont matter any way, there isn't a turkey.
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