Remembering Advent

In April of 1998 my daughter gave birth to a premature son named Devin. He weighed one pound seven ounces. The nurses at the hospital called him the Pepsi Cola baby because he wasn't much bigger than a Pepsi can. This was her second son that had been born premature. The first son was named Rico and was born in May of 1996. Rico weighed one pound fifteen ounces and was born at six months. He died nine hours after he was born. She never bonded with Devin. Instead she moved across the country with her boyfriend. So I ended up quitting my job and I became Devin's mother. Then my husband decided to leave home. It was a very trying spiritual time. So I went back to the only thing I knew in time of need, God. I also went back to my church. After, talking to my priest he told me about a program called "Remembrance." I decided to go it was on Tuesdays from September through Easter. I also had Devin baptized while he was still in the hospital.

It was hard to go to class because twice when I was in class I got an emergency page and had to leave because Devin had a code blue. I would rush to the phone and call the hospital and be told that I was needed at the hospital which was forty-five minutes away. Four times, Devin came back from the dead. Then in November on the 28th Devin coded the last time. He died on Saturday morning two days after Thanksgiving. His mother who was pregnant again had just come back Thanksgiving Day. He saw here one last time. We had mass and he was buried at the first of the next week.

The only thing that made any since during that time was going to my classes and going to weekly mass. Which was during Advent, when they began lighting the candles. I remember the smell of incense and the candles being lit, every Sunday, one by one.

Advent begins on Dec. 3, 2000 and ends on Christmas Sunday. It is in preparation of Christmas and is symbolic of the preparation of the 2nd coming of Christ. It is celebrated in the Catholic Church with special masses in which the priest wear's certain color vestments to represent the Advent season. There are four or five candles that are used to represent each of the Sundays they are usually purple but can be blue if purple can not be found the fifth candle is usually rose colored and is placed in the center of the other four. These candles are lit each Sunday during lint.

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