Buffalo Chips, Cow Patties, and the Moon
Have you ever noticed that the full Moon, Buffalo Chips, and Cow Patties all have the same shape?
The moon may have been created on the basis of what happens when you’re out strolling across the lone prairie, gazing at all the pretty wildflowers, and the jackrabbits a hopping across the landscape. And not watching where it is you are stomping your boots, you just happen to set a particular heavy stride right down into the oozy depths of a nice fresh buffalo patty.
Now, aside from the theory or the occurrence, and irrelevant to the situation, of course you’re wearing your brand new, right out of the catalog, Sunday-go-to-meeting boots your ma just told you not to get dirty.
Aside from this upcoming moon-theory, but considerably irrelevant to the subject, it is important not to confuse a buffalo patty with any other kind of patty—such as a hamburger patty. And a hamburger patty shouldn’t be confused with a cow patty which is similar to a buffalo patty in both texture and substance.
It must be made clear that you’re not entirely to blame for putting your big old foot right in the middle of that deceptively fresh-looking buffalo patty that shouldn’t have been lying around right on the trail to begin with. Some folks just don’t seem to care where they drop things, and never bother to pick them up.
Being close to Halloween, that buffalo patty was most likely masquerading as a stepping stone anyway. This would be an easy thing to do since the broiling prairie sun has just put a nice thin, dry crust on it—but please avoid using this description when ordering pizza which also comes with a thin, dry crust. The similarity and deception is that underneath that fragile crust the buffalo patty is still warm and juicy, whereas with pizza the warm juicy stuff is on top of the crust.
So now you’ve stepped on that buffalo patty real hard and all that gooey goop has to land somewhere. Nature decrees that its going to be forced upward, just about the height of the legs of your, also brand new just out of the catalog Sunday-go-to-meeting, jeans your ma just scrubbed on her wash board and ironed with a flat-iron--and told you not to get dirty.
To begin with, after that ucky stuff splatters all over you it just kind of hangs there, soft and dripping. But after a while it starts to dry and gets solid.
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