Home » Sports » Golf » Golf Bag Research - Part 3

Golf Bag Research - Part 3

© Bill Howard

The first two parts of this series of articles dealt with what one might deduce from the accessories a player totes around the golf course, and some of the positive omens you'll witness if you're observant. Now for some of the more negative evidence you will encounter:

MORE THAN 14 CLUBS- Indicates either a dishonest or absentminded nature. Neither is desirable in a potential partner. Even more damning, this classifies a golfer as overwhelmed and lacking in confidence in his or her capacity to handle a round within the rules.

MULTIPLE PUTTERS- The appearance of two putters in any one golf bag is the equivalent of an enormous neon sign announcing "BAD PUTTER!". This player will be missing the hole all day with grotesque putts. Each time a putting stroke is executed, the player will be wondering if the correct putter has been selected. After a few holes watching a "two putter player" is like watching slow motion videotape of a horrific sports injury. In a situation such as this, it's better just not to watch.

SHANK PROOF IRONS- Consider what is being avoided, what type of swing might produce it, and what a precarious mental situation this player must be in. This player is destined to crumble right before your eyes. It won't be pretty.

ABUSED METALWOODS- Specifically, metalwoods with scrape marks on the top of the club head. These scuffs are conclusive evidence of a tendency to hit weak pop flies off the tee. Do you really want a partner who hits drives that are subject to the infield fly rule? This golfer will often be hammering 3 woods for his or her second shot. That's low percentage golf that puts a huge burden on you.

WEAR ON THE TOE- Wear on the toe means a golfer strikes the ball with a glancing blow from outside in. This translates into slices of varying severity and a distinct lack of distance. These clubs are usually carried by players with 20+ handicaps.

BLUNDERBUSS SANDWEDGE- No mistaking these monstrosities. They are big, heavy looking, ugly, and ill suited to delicate work around the greens. They are sold largely via infomercial. The oversized flanges on these beasts tell you that a player is very unsure of his ability to get pitch shots airborne and is likely to try and help the ball up in the air. Disaster awaits this golfer in the sandtraps as well.

COLORED GOLF BALLS- Golf balls should be white, period. Do not partner with anyone who doesn't grasp this concept. If you are still playing with colored golf balls,

The copyright of the article Golf Bag Research - Part 3 in Golf is owned by Bill Howard. Permission to republish Golf Bag Research - Part 3 in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.