The other day I got an email from an acquaintance of mine—a gay man. We tend to agree to disagree—he thinks that bisexuality isn’t valid, and I think it is (since I am bisexual). His ex boyfriend was a bisexual that left him for another woman, and he’s still got emotional scars. He’s vowed he won’t ever date another bisexual, that they can’t stay faithful, they’ll always leave you for someone of the opposite sex…”So,” I asked him, “My ex girlfriend left me…for another woman. Should I give up on lesbians? As a matter of fact, I’ve never been in a relationship with a lesbian that was willing to trust me. Should I just stick to guys? Oh, wait, most of them don’t trust me either. Maybe I should just give up, right? I mean, I’ve never cheated in a relationship. I’ve never given anyone a reason to trust me. But I’m always upfront about my bisexuality, and then my partner is constantly waiting for me to admit that I want a man and a woman—at the same time. Since I’m bisexual, the only way I can be truly happy is in a threesome—that’s how the story goes, isn’t it?”
I admit, there are a lot of people out there who don’t think there is any such thing as bisexuality. Either you want to be with a man or a woman. I’ve never wanted a threesome, but if someone set me up on a blind date with a great guy, I’d be happy. If someone set me up on a blind date with a great woman, I’d be happy. For me, tossing aside a potential partner because of their gender is ridiculous.
Notice I said
for me. That’s because I’m noticing that some bisexuals are starting to fight back—with “fight” being the operative word.
Have you seen the “Monosexuality is so boring” shirts? Or the “Bi is better” pins? Why add fuel to the fire? Yes, bi is better—for me. It may not be better for you. I won’t say my way of life is better for you. I’ll defend my way of life if you say that it’s not “real”, or I’m just trying to stay in the closet. (By the way, telling people you’re bi isn’t a good way of staying in the closet—men think that you’re dying for a threesome—with them—and straight women live in fear of you hitting on them…and for some reason, most of them get offended when you
don’t.)
