The Middle Eastern Dowry

A unique custom in the Arab Middle East is the gifts given to the bride by her groom. The dowry is defined as the financial gift given by a man to his prospective wife before their wedding. The dowry can take many forms and differs from culture to culture. In some Middle Eastern cultures, the groom pays the dowry to the father, who may in return buy jewelry for his daughter. In others, the money is used to set up a future household in preparation for the couple's future life together. The dowry has roots from ancient Middle Eastern history and from religion.

In Ancient Egypt, the "mahr" was the initial payment by the groom to his fiance' used to set up the house and furniture before the wedding. Another gift called "Shabka" was the jewelry given to the bride before or after the wedding. In Egypt today, there is not much difference in these customs from those of Ancient Egypt. An excellent site with more information on wedding customs in Ancient Egypt and in modern day Egypt is http://www.zawaj.com/weddingways/egypt_c...

The tradition of the dowry also has roots in religion. In Islam, the dowry or the mahr, is clearly stated as an obligation by the groom to his bride in the Quran. Allah says in the Quran, "And give the women their Mahr as a free gift...Quran [4:4]. Islam also guarantees the bride has the right to keep the dowry in any event. "But if you had given the latter a cantar for dower (mahr) take not the least of it back...Quran [4:20].

The maher is a prearranged amount agreed upon by the bride and groom and specified in the Islamic wedding contract. This should not be confused with the prearranged compensation in case of divorce. In many modern Arab families, the dowry is a very small amount stated only as a symbolic gesture on the part of the bride to accept her future husband's offer. In most cases, one currency is signed by both the bride and groom to be kept as a remembrance from their wedding. Even in Christian Arab families, the groom usually gives the bride jewelry before or during the wedding.

Another unique tradition, particularly in the remote areas, are the textiles and perfume the groom's family proudly shows in their home before the wedding. Neighbors, friends and family visit the groom's family home to see what the groom has offered the bride. On an agreed upon date, the objects intended for the bride to prepare for the wedding are taken in the groom's car to the bride's house. This day is a celebrated event where family and friends follow in their own cars honking their horns.

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