Season of Love | Suite101.com

This is the time of year when love reigns. Adverts on billboards, busses, and TV inundate us with images telling us that we should all be celebrating the season with friends and family. Speakers in almost every conceivable public space pump out Christmas carols reminding us that we should be kind to each other, be of good cheer, and celebrate the miracle of love. The postal service is busy delivering greeting cards that advocate peace on earth. (G.W. Bush apparently missed the point - or perhaps he thinks that peace on earth will be easier when he's succeeded in taking over most of the non-western world and granted Haliburton the rights to rebuild everything that's been destroyed. But I digress....) Preachers implore us to show our love by donating food, blankets and money to those in need while capitalists encourage us to show our love by buying bobbles, gadgets, toys and almost anything else that can be sold.

Love, these messages all tell us, is easy, fun and quite rewarding. All you have to do is have or go to parties, send some variation of a "Seasons Greetings" card to everyone you know, drop a quarter or a dollar or a 5 into the Salvation Army bucket, or buy things for your friends, partners/spouse and relatives. Once you've done this, you've fulfilled your responsibility to love and you're done until next year.

Unfortunately, love isn't really this easy; it's not something you can do one month a year and forget about. Love is something that you have to do every day, and it is not always fun. At the community level, love is volunteering your time at a local hospital, pound, literacy program or other service-oriented place; taking an extra moment to talk to a senior citizen or a child; remembering to recycle your empty containers; and doing other things that make the planet a nicer place to be. Closer to home, love is taking out the garbage without having to be told and without making a big deal about it. Love is sitting beside your feverish child in the bathroom as they throw up for the sixth time in an hour. Love is answering the phone when your Aunt Myrtle calls to tell you about the weather rather than screening your call and pretending that you aren't home when her number pops up on your caller ID screen. Love is holding your teenager who has just called you something awful and is now in tears because he or she is in some sort of emotional pain. On the romantic front, love is being present in the relationship so that you can treat your partner with respect. Love is being willing to work through the ugly under-belly of relationships by listening attentively to your partner when they want to talk to you, without arguing back or pointing the finger of blame back to them so that they feel safe enough to tell you their truth, even when they say things that you don't want to hear. In short, love involves giving your heart and your time as well as your money.