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An Occasion For Mother

© Johanna Francisco

A friend recently asked with mild surprise, "Do you celebrate Mother's Day?"

It was my turn to be incredulous. "Yes, we do.Don't't you?"

When we were kids, family members would get together and have a luncheon at some restaurant, usually in Chinatown, for Mother's Day. In recent years, the "kids" have grown and individual schedules had become more demanding. We had not been able to celebrate like one great big family reunion, but in essence, we still observe it with our respective immediate family members. I had gotten used to this practice, I naturally assumed all Filipino American families did it too. Apparently, not.

In the Philippines, although the role of mothers is greatly revered, it was not customary to celebrate Mother's Day. It would seem that whether a Filipino American observes this special occasion is directly proportional to the length of time exposed to the American culture. For the most part, many are given to take the position of resisting commercialism. Although, surprisingly enough, there is a certain lackluster in the sales paper and mall displays for Mother's Day compared to previous years.

Personally, Mother's Day and Thanksgiving Day are two holidays that I would not mind adopting. They are all about appreciation. Commercialism does make it seem that the former should have some pressure involved in terms of gift giving. However, ask any mother and she would probably say gifts are unnecessary. Ok, given there would be a few that would defer to "optional." But like the old saying goes, it is the thought that counts.

I am fortunate to be married to a man who makes it seem like every day is Mother's Day. Frequently, he thanks me for the little things like cooking dinner and taking care of the family needs. As a result, I do feel appreciated as a wife and mother. No occasion necessary. As a daughter, a friend and a woman, I do feel the need to celebrate this occasion not for myself, but for my mom, my grandmother, aunts and girlfriends. These are important people in my life that I do not see as often as I would like due to our busy occupation of motherhood. The occasion is a nice reminder to get off the wheel for a second, reach out and let someone know what they mean to you.

Mother's Day is not just about giving the all expensive perfume or extravagant dinner out. In fact it is a totally optional occasion, especially for those who were not raised to its practice. Many Filipino Americans might want to pass this event off. It is just a marked day in the calendar just like Presidents' Day. But what mother in this world would not feel some measure of joy and satisfaction when she is told, "I love you," "Thank you," or "Well done!"

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