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Knowing and Setting Your Limits

© Tamara Peters

We have all heard it a zillion times; listen to your body, pace yourself, don't forget to breathe, know your limits, etc., etc., but what exactly does that mean?

I am as guilty as the next FMer for paying lip service to these phrases without actually applying them to my own life. I think, like most of us, I am very good at advising others to do the very thing that I am totally ignoring. The result? Meltdown = Flare (Feeling Lousy And Ready to Explode)!

Why do we constantly do this to ourselves? Why do we find it so easy to apply one set of standards to everyone else and another to ourselves? Sometimes, as we all know, there are things that we simply must do, even when we feel like something the dog dragged in.

We must pay the bills, put a roof over our heads, attend to our children, spouses,family, or whatever. We all have responsibilities that we cannot shirk. But, how many of us find ourselves forever saying yes to things we just know will exceed our limitations, but we do it anyway.

As I am fond of saying - knowing and doing are two very different things. We may know in our gut that we are causing ourselves excess stress by exceeding our limitations, but somehow or other we always seem to rationalize it by thinking that we can do it all. Then the feeling of being overwhelmed sets in and we find that actually doing, whatever it is, is not quite so simple as we had first thought. Sooooo, what do we DO about it?

I have decided to take a bit of my own advice and start setting some limitations on what I can and cannot do. I have finally reached my saturation point and realize that something has to give - not only for my mental health, but for my physicial health as well. But where to start?

I have decided to start by first setting priorities. My family, friends, work, ooops, almost forgot myself, lol, have to come first. There are responsibilities and needs here that have to be met. Secondly, well, comes everything else. Of my obligations here, the Fibromyalgia Friends have always been, and will always be, my first priority. Their needs are my needs. I simply am not willing to give them anything less than my best. I am willing to cut back elsewhere, wherever necessary, in order to do this.

The copyright of the article Knowing and Setting Your Limits in Fibromyalgia is owned by Tamara Peters. Permission to republish Knowing and Setting Your Limits in print or online must be granted by the author in writing.