Black Sheep, Outcast, Friend or Family: Who has the Disorder?

WHO HAS THE DISORDER?

Do you know someone with epilepsy or seizures that you've convinced yourself that you're worlds above merely "humane" to? The fact that you let them tag along isn't adequate. That is more equated to carting around baggage or a handbag instead of a resemblance of a human. Since when are we kidding ourselves that this inclusion is not referred to as hypocritical? Your interest is generally not maliciousness, but this type of treatment is a lie-a lie to yourself and it hurts others. Be it the family "black sheep", social misfit, recluse, "peculiar one", or your "embarrassing inconvenience", by any other name your thoughts speak louder than your intent. Why is that? Simply because nobody made you think about it. Now that you're thinking about it, you must come to grips with a new reality check about yourself. On your community outings do you find scheduling times that your black sheep can't purposely come to so they cannot potentially embarrass you? Take a blatantly honest, close personal introspection and uncover your ugly, well-kept family secret. It is pathetic that society promotes hermit-like behavior for those with epilepsy by denying work by virtue of ridiculous excuses like "YOU CAN'T DRIVE", (even if the seizures are controlled!) Lack of job history adds an extra barrier creating more permanently disabling viewpoints existing in society and families. Family and friends, however, are another story. In many cases the parents whose job is to nurture, actually kills by disintegrating chances of a promising future. The close sphere of people are critical to a person with seizures. Experiences of having their life cast aside, their existence ignored over protest, don't build character. An estranged look in the eye of a parent can even squelch fostering independent living skills over time. The detached parents are literally creating their "black sheep". They are creating a person who has the potential to be helpless in society and afraid of social situations. Vanity and pride on the behalf of the "well meaning" are almost fatal to a person that is supposed to know what love is. What does family really mean in the context of someone who not only has seizures, but a dual diagnosis, plus maybe a developmental disability? The support contained within its framework is indispensable. Family, to me personally, has the positive connotation of loving unconditionally. Fortunately I was blessed with living that reality. As we know many do not, sadly, and they must create "surrogate families". These often consist of friends who have the same disorder, doctors, social workers or therapists. It doesn't have to be this way.

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