Coping with an Eating Disorder and Pregnancy
Of course, some people would argue that a woman with an eating disorder should get herself healthy before even considering having a baby. They might point out that not only can the pregnancy and weight issues be difficult to cope with, but raising a child is not always easy either! If you can't take care of yourself, how are you going to take care of a child? Now, for the most part I do agree with that idea, but I'm also aware enough to know that sometimes things don't always happen in the most convenient and planned way. Plus, you might feel like you were well on your way to recovery before you got pregnant, only to find those old tormenting issues flare back up with your pregnancy.
In my own case, I was pregnant for a good part of last year, as well as the beginning of this year. Part of me was terrified of gaining pregnancy weight. Now, keep in mind, that I was not super-skinny when I got pregnant, nor was I hard-core into my eating disorder. On the contrary, I was several years into recovery, and only occasionally having flare-ups of my old eating disorder habits (or should I say, BAD habits!). Also, I was smack in the middle of my "healthy" weight range given to me by a doctor many years ago (not that it would have been any easier if I WAS super skinny!). Yet, there I was, horrified at the prospect of getting bigger (and bigger, and bigger...) and far bypassing my "healthy" weight range...but eager to have a healthy pregnancy and a happy, healthy baby. I had to make a conscious decision to force myself to get rid of my weight fears for 10 months. I threw away my scale, and tried not to restrict, binge or purge, or generally obsess about my weight. It was tough, believe me! It wasn't as easy as it may sound either...there were certainly days when I looked at my growing belly and body in the mirror and cried. But, if I was hungry, I ate. Plus I took my pre-natal vitamins religously, and kept all my pre-natal appointments.
In the end I gained 50 pounds. (How's THAT for not restricting!!) They weighed me when I checked into the hospital, and when they told me my weight I realized that I weighed a full 100 pounds more than
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