Some Practical Helps
This article is written using an excerpt from a book by Pamela Perez called "Just Before Dawn" It is our hope that this section will offer some practical helps for those of you dealing with DID and all the accompanying issues surrounding it. Since the section is long we will be printing it in several sections here.
"From where does my help come?" Ps. 121:1
It was another one of those days - a day when I wondered where I would get the strength to hold on just one more time. I began to look around me. I'm so weary, Lord... I just can't do it! Dishes, laundry, a checkbook to balance, work to attend to... then the sound of my daughter in the next room... I'll do it for her, I told myself, for my sons and my husband. How could he ever take care of them alone? But then I had said that the last time I was in this place, the last time I felt overwhelmed and frustrated and like I could barely make it through. Now look at me, again, I'm just not there for them, again unable to get myself up and doing what I should, again never quite able to measure up, always feeling like a failure, defeated and sad and oh so tired... And once again, I asked myself, Why? Wouldn't they all be better off without me??
There were other times, too, that brought me far too close to the breaking point, times when such deep disappointment came, either in myself and the overwhelming feelings of shame and guilt I had as a mother (or wife, or friend, or 'good' Christian, or whatever), times when the misunderstandings and rejection I felt as my family and friends who just could not understand the pain and costliness of the healing process seemed beyond my ability to bear. How could they? At such times those feelings of wondering if they honestly would be better off without me were so intense and difficult to get through. I couldn't help but wonder if was worth it all.
That was quite a while ago, and thankfully, I did hold on, and I did get through, but not until I came to the place first where I began to measure things from an entirely different perspective. The conclusion I finally had to come to was that if my health or healing or sense of worth and value had to be dependent upon my own resources, or upon any other person, then disappointment and discouragement were sure to follow.
Latest Articles