The Importance of Safe Touch in the Healing Process
Even our children are starving from a lack of touch. Because in our society so much in our attitudes about touch has become sexualized, we place more and more restrictions on the use of physical touch (Hunter & Struve, 1998). We are, of course, referring to touch from parents here. Because touch has become (unfortunately, all too often necessarily so) something we have had to teach our children not to allow anyone else to "do" without becoming highly suspicious, anyone who would "touch" too much is immediately suspect. Further, once our children reach adolescence touch for them also becomes taboo. Hunter & Struve make this statement:
By the time American children reach adolescence, few, if any, socially sanctioned opportunities for physical contact remain that do not carry the burden of double meaning, whereby any touch becomes subject to interpretation or misinterpretation as a sexual overture. Most channels for physical contact become plagued with sexual connotations once children enter puberty.
This is a sad state of affairs, because touch at any age is vital on several levels. First, it is just one of many non-verbal forms of communication. It can express comfort, sympathy, concern, support, understanding, and give one a sense of being heard, often in ways that words cannot. It can convey empathy, respect, connection, and when applied carefully and appropriately with those who struggle (we are including those whose struggle is in the area of dissociation here, in particular) provide a source of grounding, as well as an aid and outlet for emotional release. Done with respect, care, and consideration, this can be one of the greatest means to healing.
In an article by Carolynne Stevens on the NARA website (referenced below), the restorative impact of healing touch is discussed. "Touch has the first, most direct and powerful effect on the brain's programming and re-programming activity. When we think of all the ways tactile stimulation relates to verbal/cognitive and physical involvement... it is no accident that so much of restorative therapy is built around using familiar tactile work and leisure activities to develop or repair brain functions." How true! We have an essential human need for "tactile connection" according to Stevens, for human touch, in order for emotional and mental development and well-being to be achieved. "Sometimes even for the will to live," say Stevens.
References:
Bear, M., Connors, B. & Paradiso, M. (2001). Neuroscience; exploring the brain. Second Edition
Baltimore, MD; Lippincott Williams & Wilkins.
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