Attachment: The Bond Between Parent and Child

Parents and children share a special bond. Many theories have been proposed to account for the close ties shared among family members. The most influential to date is John Bowlby's theory of attachment.

Bowbly reasoned from an ethological perspective, which is basically an extension of Darwin's theory (remember from high school, survival of the fittest?). From this perspective, much of human behavior evolved because of its adaptive value. Bowbly applied these ideas to the bond that parents and infants share.

Children form an attachment or a bond to parents because it enhances their chances for survival, from an evolutionary standpoint. We're not aware of this on a conscious level. Rather, our species is "wired" to form such attachments because our prehistoric ancestors did and it enhanced their survival.

Bowlby argued that infants and parents are innately attuned to each other. Infants display what he called "signaling behaviors" such as smiling, laughing, and clinging to their caregivers. Signaling behaviors attract the caregiver's attention and bring them into close contact, and thus enhance the infant's chances for survival. In turn, adults innately respond to an infant's signaling behaviors. Do you find yourself naturally drawn to babies? According to Bowlby this is a survival mechanism that's innate and enables our species to proliferate.

Whether or not they adopt this ethological perspective, most psychologists will agree that there is a bond between parents and infants. Psychologist, Mary Ainsworth elaborated Bowlby's ideas. She argued that all children develop an attachment to their parents, even children who are abused. While children of different parenting styles and environments all develop a bond to their parents, they differ in the security of attachment. Security refers to children's confidence in their caregiver, the belief that the caregiver will be available to meet their needs. Ainsworth's research shows that infants tend to develop secure attachments when their caregivers are compassionate, consistent, and warm.

The key to helping your baby form a secure attachment is being sensitive and responsive to her. This includes responding to her cries, caring for her physical needs (like food, warmth, safe conditions, etc.), but also meeting her social needs. Babies and children need more than physical care; they need love, cuddling, and snuggling. Caregivers who read and react appropriately to their baby's signals for social attention are more likely to foster strong attachment bonds.

For more information about attachment, check out these links:

Attachment Theory
Attachment: Biology, Evolution and Environment
What is Attachment?

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