Yuletide - Games, Guns 'n Glory


© Dan Caines

We're "Rockin' around the Christmas tree" and "Santa Claus is comin' to town" with "Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer". And as anyone who has seen the new Bond movie knows, "Christmas" jokes are just not funny. So I'll try not to make any more. Possibly. Sorry.

So I guess it's time to write those Christmas lists, boys and girls. And just in case you do not have a clue what to buy, here is Suite 101's handy list of presents to keep you going well into the New Year. In fact, some of them may well slip into the New Year, but we assure you they will be worth waiting for:

All's Quiet on the Hardware Front this Christmas, apart from a few murmurings in the Graphics card trenches. Steaming over the hillsides like an artillery barrage on acid we have the Nvidia GeForce chipset. The worlds first "GPU" or Graphics Processing Unit, it is supposedly so powerful that it takes a significant part of the graphics processing away from the processor, speeding up all graphics-based applications. The based currently available card using this chip is the (snappily-named) Creative 3D Blaster GeForce 256 Annihilator. Expect there to be more in the New Year.

Games wise, to quote Will Smith "We never had it better 'n this". Yes indeed. We are entering what will verily be a kick-ass period in the history of worldwide gaming. First up, for those of you with massively fast internet connections, or a beard and a Dungeons and Dragons fxation, we have Asheron's Call, Microsoft's entry into the Massively Multiplayer Game market. Supposedly, it has a "fully dynamic games world", with "spontaneous events" and full character interaction. Surf Over to the Microsoft Internet Gaming Zone for details.

And coming at ya "Slicker than Rick" we have the very polished indeed "Unreal Tournament". A new offering from the makers, surprisingly enough, of Unreal, this offers both a superb online game, with clever maps, satisfying weapons, and many games modes - and an actually very good single player variant where you play against computer-controlled human-simulating Bots. Muy excellente, no?

And "Bustin' Some mad rhymes" in a "homeys crib" near you is the crime-fuelled, newly-updated Grand Theft Auto Two. Featuring violence, swearing, incredible amounts of fun and, well, more swearing and violence, this game will surely keep you entertained until the Millennium Bug strikes down your computer, and all the control systems for Russian Nuclear Power stations break and meltdown. By which time you will probably not care anyway. So this Yuletide season, immerse yourself in an alternate world as this one falls apart around you.

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