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Those Pearl-Bedecked 50s Housewives

© Dane Mitchell Donato

Just how far have we come as a society since the 1950s, when the Cold War was very, very chilly indeed? Ah, I believe I see a more attentive audience member holding up their hand now? Yes sir, stand and speak clearly so we can all hear your question.

“How do you mean? In race relations, engineering, medicine, aeronautics, the arts?”

Good question indeed! And up here at the Podium of Authority, I would say a long way indeed. We, as a society, I am proud to say, have vanquished many of the dragons of just two decades ago. We still have a long way to go, I’m afraid, but we’ve made a jolly good start.

“How about in home economics? How are we doing there?”

Good question! Just fine, I’m happy to report. And that brings me to the following bit of whimsy, and the main reason I’m up here pontificating in the first place. I’ve seen this from a number of sources, so I will say right now that I myself can’t verify the exact origin of the following essay. One source suggested that it was published in a Home Ec textbook published in the 50s, and another has stated that it was advice given to a blushing bride just before the big trip down the isle.

But wherever it came from, I want to thank the original writer. He (and I am sure it was a he) had some fine advice for those budding housewives out there ready to do their part in the wider world. And so, without any further ado, I bring you:

The Good Wives Guide

Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favorite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.

Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

Clear away clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Gather up schoolbooks, toys, papers, etc. and then run a dust cloth over the tables.

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