You Know You've Had Too Much Coffee When....


© Katherine Austinson
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Feb 2, 2001


Do you have some more of these catch phrases in your files? Share in the discussion below, will you?

You Know You've Had Too Much Coffee When....Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp.

When you call radio talk shows, they ask you to turn yourself down.

Your life goal is to amount to a hill of beans.

You channel surf faster without a remote.

You name your cats "Cream" and "Sugar."

You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.

You can outlast the Energizer bunny.

You short out motion detectors.

Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.

You think CPR stands for "Coffee Provides Resuscitation."

Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.

You think Columbia would be a great vacation destination!

You're passing everybody on the freeway when you suddenly realize: you left your car at home!

You think being called a "drip" is a compliment.

You help your dog chase its tail.

You're up to four heart attacks a day.

Your coffee mug is insured by Lloyd's of London.

You introduce your spouse as your coffeemate.

You answer the door before people knock. You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse. You just completed another sweater and you don't know how to knit.

You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.

You sleep with your eyes open.

You have to watch videos in fast-forward.

The only time you're standing still is during an earthquake.

You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.

You spend your vacations visiting "Maxwell House" .

You've worn out your third pair of tennis shoes this week.

Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.

You chew on other people's fingernails.

The Nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.

All your kids are named "Joe" .

You're the employee of the month at the local coffee house and you don't even work there.

SOURCES: http://www.netgrab.com/fun/members/coffee http://www.caffmag.com http://www.connect.ab.ca

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Here's the follow-up discussion on this article: View all related messages
7.   Aug 23, 2001 6:20 PM
In response to message posted by shakka_kan:

Thanks for the link - great info!!!! ...

-- posted by kaustinson
6.   Aug 13, 2001 7:34 AM
I thought this and all the associated facts were highly enjoyable:

http://abcnews.go.com/sections/cud/08082001_buzz/index.html ...

-- posted by shakka_kan
5.   Jun 8, 2001 1:37 PM
In response to message posted by BuckyRea:

Bucky Rea, those are really good! At the moment, there's water in my mug, but anywa ...

-- posted by Dan_Ellsworth
4.   Jun 8, 2001 11:25 AM
...when you look at the used wet grounds in the Mr Coffee filter and start thinking, "just a pinch between the cheek and gum..."

...when your "sponsor" pours you a shot of whiskey to sober you back ...

-- posted by BuckyRea
3.   Jun 6, 2001 7:35 PM
In response to message posted by Dan_Ellsworth:

You know you drink too much coffee when you acknowledge you actually have a ...

-- posted by missarrowette



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