Here are a few ways in which you could convey that message in our dialogue:
Make it clear that you don't see minor and one-time offenders as delinquents.
"I hate to deprive you of a privilege on account of just one infraction, but the privilege is for perfect conduct, so I'm afraid I'll have to."
Make it clear that you are cheering for the student.
"Sorry I can't give you a privilege this time. Better luck next time!"
Ask for the student's help in suggesting alternative consequences.
The student doesn't want to go to the office. Nor do you want to send the student to the office for fear that the principal will ask, "What's the matter? Can't you manage the class by yourself?"
So at least you and student agree on something; start from there!
Show your parental drive.
"I hate to be so mean to a cute kid like you, but I'm afraid I'll have to."
Nature probably made children cute because we would knock them across the room if they weren't.
Make it clear that there is a chain of command over you, too.
"I know you think I'm being mean to you, but I have to keep you in line before the principal gets mean to me. And she has to keep me in line before the superintendent gets mean to her."
Make it clear that the student is welcome in your class.
"I'd like for you to be able to stay in the class. Will that be possible?"
Can you come up with any others?
If you can, then share them with us on the discussion page.
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