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A Holiday Classic: <i>The Best Christmas Pageant Ever</i>

© Susan Jensen

When I entered third grade, I found myself learning under the sternest, most feared teacher in the entire elementary school. Miss Rapp stood as straight as a ruler and tolerated no talking or fooling around in her classroom. On the first day of school, a boy in the class asked her a question without raising his hand; she grabbed his purple Garfield binder and threw it in the metal trash can. The sound echoed ominously in the silent room. Another time, she kept us all in from recess because someone had ripped a piece of construction paper while we were making a craft project. We had to keep our heads down and our mouths zipped as punishment. Miss Rapp seemed too cold and strict to be human. As Christmas approached that year, she started reading The Best Christmas Pageant Ever(1972) by Barbara Robinson, out loud to us. She began the book in her nasal monotone, which soon gave way to slight giggles and then gales of laughter. All of us watched in amazement as Miss Rapp laughed and laughed, tears streaming down her rigid little face. Finally, she handed the book to a student since she was laughing so hard that she could no longer read. That was when I knew that Miss Rapp was not only human but also a warm and loving person.

I recently reread this Christmas classic and found myself in the same predicament Miss Rapp was in those many years ago. This book is laugh-out-loud hysterical. The story centers around the Herdman kids, who were "absolutely the worst kids in the history of the world," according to the narrator, a young girl who never offers her name (Beth?). The six children spend all of their time terrorizing the neighborhood by lying, stealing, bullying, arson and smoking cigars. Since the rest of the children have to put up with the Herdmans in school five days a week, they look forward to Sunday as a "real day of rest." Unfortunately, the narrator's little brother, Charlie, brags to the Herdmans about all of the food they get in Sunday School. Charlie's lies bring the unruly Herdmans to church and before anyone knows it, they have bullied their way into the annual Christmas pageant. Now the traditional play stars Herdmans in all of the key roles: Mary, Joseph, the shepherds and the three wise men. The whole congregation is outraged, but excited to see just what the Herdmans will do. The narrator's mother, on whom the responsibility of organizing the pageant falls, vows to make this the best Christmas pageant ever. And it is, but not in the way everyone expects. The surprise ending seems appropriate and sweet without being overly sentimental.

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